Vaseline has to be number one because no matter who’s side you are on, no matter who you are or what country you are from, you are getting screwed and the Vaseline will help lubricate the pain away.
Earmuffs are a very close second so that when you see that a presidential speech is coming or any political speech for that matter, you can quickly put these on. These not only will do you good in the range, or at the racetrack pit area, these will stop you hearing all the bullshit that spews out of the mouths of these political nightmares that plague our great country.
In third place very importantly is Kaopectate, or if they run out the next gift they can give to replace the Kao is Pepto Bismo which will also help with the diarrhea that is caused in case you weren’t fast acting enough with the earmuffs above. It tastes OK and will relieve the stomach shitty feeling you get when you listen to the lies day in and day out.
Fourth place if all else fails is Advil to eliminate the headaches you get when you get stuck watching the mainstream media, especially if you are in the airport or some waiting room and they have one of the mainstream news channels on. Listening to the mouth flapping, blabbering bullshit even for just a minute of your day if nothing short of theft of your time. While you may need number three for this condition, an Advil will usually help with the headache received from this type of yapping.
In our opinion aaside from the 4 free gifts Americans should be given, political talk should have a health risk warning label for those who don’t know and decide to start listening to it. Or have recently became involved because suddenly there lives have been affected by the distorted pocket lining politician in their area. People start listening and the symptoms of sickness moves in. Listen at your risk.